cat mafia

I’ve said it before, but now I see it more clearly than ever.  Our cats have all the personality of an evil mastermind and his cronies.

 

What caused this suspicion to resurface, you ask?  Superman, of course.

 

Have you seen Man of Steel?  You should.  It’s worth it.  And I must confess, my opinion of it has improved after a weekend long Superman marathon.  I don’t know if I just never saw the original (except Superman III…I distinctly remember childhood nightmares pertaining to Superman III), or if I was simply too young to remember it.  But I have to say that Man of Steel is a fantastic nod to the original, and Henry Cavill would have made Christopher Reeve proud.

 

Now, to the point.  In the first Superman movie, Lex Luthor plans to defeat Superman by way of Kryptonite (surprise surprise) so he can gain control of some nuclear missiles.  And who does Lex keep in his back pocket to help do his dirty work?  Otis, (a less-than-intelligent oaf who probably can’t count to 20 without taking off his shoes) and Miss Teschmacher…um, the arm candy.  In this triad of terribleness we saw, quiet clearly, the personalities of our three felines.

 

Miss Teschmacher (Roger), Otis (Rufus), and Lex Luthor (Frank)

Rufus is obviously the Otis of the group.  He’s cute but stupid.  He has a lumbering walk and runs into walls more times than he should.  He takes orders from the boss and is simply just a dumb henchman.  Were he in the actual mafia, he would be the guy who tossed you in your cement shoes into the ocean.

 

Frank, you should have realized, is the boss, the evil mastermind…she is our Lex Luthor.  She is, without question, the brains of the operation.  And if you’re in their company for more than 5 mins, you know that Frank runs the show.  She’s the Don.  She’s Marlon Brando (in The Godfather, not Superman).

 

And that leaves Roger…aka Miss Teschmacher.  He’s pretty and he knows it.  He would readily cause distraction with a swish of his tail.  And let’s face it, he’s a bit of a fop so I know he’d be all over those awesome sequin gowns.  Now, in The Godfather, he’s more of your consigliere, your Robert Duval.  He’s the good looking smooth talker, the boss’ right hand man.  But you know he’s wearing expensive shoes either way.

 

But I suppose, in this group, we can’t leave out poor Jack…the lovable, big eyed, best friend…yes, you’ve guessed it.

Jack is Clark Kent.

 

boot camp

It’s been a little over a week since Jack moved in, and I think we’re gonna make it!  The cats have gone from being utterly terrified of him and hiding whenever he was in the room to only freaking out if he gets within about a foot of them.  I call that improvement.  Just yesterday, all four of them voluntarily entered and hung out in a room that neither Trey nor I were in.  Yes indeed, I think we’re gonna make it.

 

The day we adopted Jack he weighed 118 lbs. which, for a golden retriever is pretty much morbidly obese.  His ideal weight is 75 lbs.  He’s got to lose 43 lbs. as soon as possible to ensure he has a healthy long life ahead of him.  Since he had heart-worms (twice) as a puppy he hasn’t always been able to exercise, but that day at the vet we got the go ahead to kick his butt into gear since enough time has passed since his heart-worm treatment.  We were also incredibly lucky in that the vet gave us a free 6lb. bag, one bag of treats, and two cans of prescription weight-loss dog food.  “It’s like Adkin’s for dogs,” she told us.  We immediately started integrating it into his old food and are now almost solely on the new food – and he likes it even better!

 

The day we adopted Jack (Friday a week ago) he couldn’t walk all the way around the block.  He got around the 3rd corner and laid down…and after a 5 minute rest made it all the way to our drive way and had to lay down for another 5 minutes before mustering the energy to make it in the front door.  Each day he made it a little further, and by Tuesday he made it all the way around the block without stopping once!  I’m not gonna lie – that brought tears to my eyes, I was so proud!  The following Friday, he walked up the stairs!  That’s something we genuinely thought would take months to achieve – and he did it by himself with no prodding from us.  And by yesterday, he went up and down the stairs about 10 times.

 

This morning we dropped him off at the vet for a teeth cleaning and he’s already down a pound.  Dogs are just like people when it comes to weight loss – if they lose more than a pound or two a week then it’s not very healthy and it’s not likely to stick.

 

We are THRILLED with Jack’s progress.  We take him for a walk around the block once a day (for now – hoping to increase that soon) and play with him outside for half an hour to an hour each day – he has officially claimed our black tennis ball, the blue one doesn’t do it for him.  While he hasn’t quite grasped the concept of “fetch” he’s really good at retrieving a thrown ball and carrying it off to chew on before you wrestle it from his jaws to throw it again.

 

So, Biggest Loser Canine Edition is in full effect in our household. I’ve gotta say, since Jack came into our home, it certainly hasn’t been dull!